Through the years, it's become the n-word for people who are overweight.
Then come the jokes:
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Not only is society okay with making fun of fat people, but those who are chunky even have a term for it: "Fat shaming."
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According to every doctor I've spoken to, twenty pounds over the average weight is, not just fat, but obese. The word chubby doesn't even exist anymore.
The average weight for a person my age [33] is around 178 pounds [80 kg]. A large person's average weight is roughly 198 pounds [90ish kg]. I Googled the results, which don't take into account that not everyone is the same height or genetics, which both contribute to a person's weight.
Although most of my weight consists of muscle, I'm considered obese according to the number.
Being fat is so funny to people here in Japan, too.
Three times a random man over sixty has thought it was socially acceptable to come over to me, laugh, and poke my stomach. The last time it happened, I was at a park enjoying Hanami with a friend.
A group of ten drunken old men circled me while chuckling and patted my gut.
A group of ten drunken old men circled me while chuckling and patted my gut.
I was able to laugh about it and make fun of them for being old. But, the comments, the expressions of judgment, the pointing--really aggravated me.
Even though they gave me a ton of sake for free, and were just trying to have a good time, I wanted to knock those jolly jerks out. How dare they think it was okay to make fun of the way I look.
Am I fat? Yes, according to doctors and random old men. My height and muscle mass don't matter. All that matters: I have a gut, therefore should diet. And it's okay to make fun of me.
Doesn't matter to society that I do my best.
My weight is joke, something I can easily fix and don't because I'm lazy.
Right?
It's hilarious.
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You know what's not funny?
My sister killed herself because she hated how she looked.
I'm not sharing this for pity, instead to point out how hard it is for people, not just fat people, but everyone. My sister never loved herself because of how she looked. That killed her.
I, however, love myself. I'm not in denial of being overweight. I do my best and can't control what happens beyond that factor. So I deal with it and decide to put one foot forward.
Being overweight doesn't cause me to love myself any less either. Nor will I let people who don't know me tell me how to feel about myself.
Do they know I had major operations that make it impossible for me to bend certain ways so I can't do a natural sit-up, or how I struggle to tie my shoes and put on socks? How my legs fall asleep at random because of my poor blood circulation? Do they know 30 of the 230 pounds I weigh comes from metal in my body holding it all together?
And you know what, anyone who assumes I need to go on a diet--that I'm fat for no reason--that it's funny can stick it where the sun don't shine.
On that, tonight, I had a date with a girl much younger than me. Too young I realize now. 19. Over the phone she was engaging, fun, and interesting. So when she asked me out, I said, "Yes."
We met at one of my favorite spots in Nagoya and headed to a skyline cafe where we'd get a good view of the city.
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I didn't put two-and-two together when she made a comment about how I was lucky there's an elevator to get up there while staring at my gut.
At the cafe, everything she talked about was looks, too.
She kept calling herself ugly so I'd compliment her and the sucker I am, I told her she was beautiful. Actually, she was pretty, but I discovered only on the outside. My main qualm about her attitude was when I paid she didn't thank me or say anything about it, as if she'd expected the gesture. For the record, if someone pays for you, thank them.
I pointed out this nice place across the way from the cafe. The Skyline Promenade.
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Did she mention the glorious view?
No.
She said something else about me being lucky there was an elevator, this time pointing to my gut. And then I realized what she was saying. "I was fat."
I told her she was funny and let things be.
As we walked around the promenade, the girl was extremely negative, pointing at every couple and saying they wouldn't last. On the bright side, she enjoyed the music and sang a little. It was very cute.
When I playfully leaped up on a bench, and like a ninja parried from one ledge to the other she jested, "Be careful, you might break them. Because you're fat."
Looking back, I was physically and metaphorically leaping away from her.
At this point, I was done. I said, "Oh, look, the exit."
I'd been to this place two other times. This was my quickest visit.
By the way, I paid for her there, too, and again, not even a thank you. She went to the restroom.
I checked my phone and noticed right before our date had began she sent me a text.
Mine to her was, "Here," as in I was waiting for her.
Her reply, "you you can diet to."
I had noticed she'd sent me a text when we met up, but hadn't read it until then and there kicked myself for wasting my time with her. The date was an hour and a half and over in a blink. I told her I had to go, that a friend sent me an emergency text. She could tell I just wanted the date to be over.
"Fat."
It's not a word that scares me and if someone judges me for being a bit overweight it's on them.
No one ever asks if I eat healthy. It's assumed because I'm over the standard weight I eat like an asshole and never exercise.
Yet, I do watch what I put into my body.
I lift weights about three times a week and get some cardio in, too.
Here's the insane cardio activity that I do on my roof when it isn't raining:
Cardio Formula
1) Start 1-min wall squat 2)
1-min jog
3) Dips x30 4) 1-min jump jacks
5) Dips x30 6) 1-min knee raises
7) Dips x30 8) 1-min jog
9) Mountain climbers x30 10) 1-min jj
11) Mountain climbers x30 12) 1-min knee raises
13) Mountain climbers x30 14) 1-min jog
15) Push-ups x30 16) 1-min jj
17) Push-ups x30 18) 1-min knee raises
19) Push-ups 20) 1-min mid kicks
21) squats x30 22) 1-min side kicks
23) squats x30 24) 1-min long kicks
25) squats x30 26) 1-min mid kicks
27) ballet squats x30 28) 1-min side kicks
29) ballet squats x30 30) 1-min long kicks
31) ballet squats x30 32) 1-min mid kicks
33) crunches x30 34) 1-min side kicks
35) crunches x30 36) 1-min long kicks
37) crunches x30 38) 1-min MLH punches
39) leg crunches x30 40) 1-min MLH punches
41) leg crunches x30 42) 1-min MLH punches
43) leg crunches x30 44) 1-min scissors up down
45) leg stretch left to right 46) 1-min scissors up down
47) leg stretch left to right 49) 1-min scissors up down
50) leg stretch left to right 51) 1-min leg scissors left right
52) Pilates ground side leg lift x30 53) 1-min leg scissors left right
54) Pilates ground side leg lift x30 55) 1-min leg scissors left right
56) Pilates ground side leg lift x30 58) 1-min calve stretch
59) resting yoga 5-mins 60) End 1-min Plank
3) Dips x30 4) 1-min jump jacks
5) Dips x30 6) 1-min knee raises
7) Dips x30 8) 1-min jog
9) Mountain climbers x30 10) 1-min jj
11) Mountain climbers x30 12) 1-min knee raises
13) Mountain climbers x30 14) 1-min jog
15) Push-ups x30 16) 1-min jj
17) Push-ups x30 18) 1-min knee raises
19) Push-ups 20) 1-min mid kicks
21) squats x30 22) 1-min side kicks
23) squats x30 24) 1-min long kicks
25) squats x30 26) 1-min mid kicks
27) ballet squats x30 28) 1-min side kicks
29) ballet squats x30 30) 1-min long kicks
31) ballet squats x30 32) 1-min mid kicks
33) crunches x30 34) 1-min side kicks
35) crunches x30 36) 1-min long kicks
37) crunches x30 38) 1-min MLH punches
39) leg crunches x30 40) 1-min MLH punches
41) leg crunches x30 42) 1-min MLH punches
43) leg crunches x30 44) 1-min scissors up down
45) leg stretch left to right 46) 1-min scissors up down
47) leg stretch left to right 49) 1-min scissors up down
50) leg stretch left to right 51) 1-min leg scissors left right
52) Pilates ground side leg lift x30 53) 1-min leg scissors left right
54) Pilates ground side leg lift x30 55) 1-min leg scissors left right
56) Pilates ground side leg lift x30 58) 1-min calve stretch
59) resting yoga 5-mins 60) End 1-min Plank
BEG: ¼ of above
INT: ½
Despite my hard work and dedication to living healthy, almost everyone has advice for me on what I should do to lose weight, and they never ask what I do do or how much I've improved over the last few years. Or the most important question, "Why am I overweight?"
Doesn't matter to society that I do my best.
My weight is joke, something I can easily fix and don't because I'm lazy.
Right?
It's hilarious.
[credit]
You know what's not funny?
My sister killed herself because she hated how she looked.
I'm not sharing this for pity, instead to point out how hard it is for people, not just fat people, but everyone. My sister never loved herself because of how she looked. That killed her.
I, however, love myself. I'm not in denial of being overweight. I do my best and can't control what happens beyond that factor. So I deal with it and decide to put one foot forward.
Being overweight doesn't cause me to love myself any less either. Nor will I let people who don't know me tell me how to feel about myself.
Do they know I had major operations that make it impossible for me to bend certain ways so I can't do a natural sit-up, or how I struggle to tie my shoes and put on socks? How my legs fall asleep at random because of my poor blood circulation? Do they know 30 of the 230 pounds I weigh comes from metal in my body holding it all together?
And you know what, anyone who assumes I need to go on a diet--that I'm fat for no reason--that it's funny can stick it where the sun don't shine.
On that, tonight, I had a date with a girl much younger than me. Too young I realize now. 19. Over the phone she was engaging, fun, and interesting. So when she asked me out, I said, "Yes."
We met at one of my favorite spots in Nagoya and headed to a skyline cafe where we'd get a good view of the city.
[credit]
I didn't put two-and-two together when she made a comment about how I was lucky there's an elevator to get up there while staring at my gut.
At the cafe, everything she talked about was looks, too.
She kept calling herself ugly so I'd compliment her and the sucker I am, I told her she was beautiful. Actually, she was pretty, but I discovered only on the outside. My main qualm about her attitude was when I paid she didn't thank me or say anything about it, as if she'd expected the gesture. For the record, if someone pays for you, thank them.
I pointed out this nice place across the way from the cafe. The Skyline Promenade.
[credit]
Did she mention the glorious view?
No.
She said something else about me being lucky there was an elevator, this time pointing to my gut. And then I realized what she was saying. "I was fat."
I told her she was funny and let things be.
As we walked around the promenade, the girl was extremely negative, pointing at every couple and saying they wouldn't last. On the bright side, she enjoyed the music and sang a little. It was very cute.
When I playfully leaped up on a bench, and like a ninja parried from one ledge to the other she jested, "Be careful, you might break them. Because you're fat."
Looking back, I was physically and metaphorically leaping away from her.
At this point, I was done. I said, "Oh, look, the exit."
I'd been to this place two other times. This was my quickest visit.
By the way, I paid for her there, too, and again, not even a thank you. She went to the restroom.
I checked my phone and noticed right before our date had began she sent me a text.
Mine to her was, "Here," as in I was waiting for her.
Her reply, "you you can diet to."
I had noticed she'd sent me a text when we met up, but hadn't read it until then and there kicked myself for wasting my time with her. The date was an hour and a half and over in a blink. I told her I had to go, that a friend sent me an emergency text. She could tell I just wanted the date to be over.
"Fat."
It's not a word that scares me and if someone judges me for being a bit overweight it's on them.
